Online Confessions: Layers of Digital Identity
Ah, the complexities of digital identity. So who are you, really?
Recently, I immersed myself in co-living communities to focus on personal growth in a physically embodied and connected way.
As Andrej at Deep Work puts it, “Living in a safe space with people who seek human connection makes you reflect on your beliefs, push your boundaries, and learn a lot about yourself. You meet many who care deeply about the human experience and share their insights.”
This period of introspection in a physical setting blossomed my fascination with digital psychology and the fluidity of our online selves. What follows is a framework of ideas, a starting point for contemplating our multifaceted digital identities.
First, a haiku:
In digital realms, We craft selves from shifting codes— Who am I today?
ღ꧁ღ╭⊱ꕥ
Social media and digital platforms have fundamentally altered our self-perception, embedding identity into the virtual realm through avatars and profiles. We often overlook our active role in shaping these digital selves, creating a phenomenon where online personas are as significant as physical identities.
Why does this fascinate me? I grew up across several multi-cultural cities while discovering social media in my teens. I’ve learned a lot from a life of complex, confusing experiences.
My identity has been a deep creative expression; a way to return to myself and my own sense of home.
The paradox of self-expression
Early 2000s platforms like MySpace, Tumblr, and virtual worlds like The Sims and RuneScape opened the floodgates for identity experimentation. These spaces allowed us to either recreate our ‘real-life’ selves online or become something entirely new. Self-expression helps expand parts of ourselves, it can be both healing and transcend our physical limitations.
Take the fashion world as a parallel. Often seen as individualistic, fashion is also deeply collective.The Exactitudes project from pre-internet 1994 grouped similarly dressed people from urban tribes in Rotterdam. What emerged was a visual representation of uniformity within social groups.
The grids of photographs reveal how our quest for uniqueness often leads us to blend in with our social groups. This mirrors convergent evolution in nature, where diverse species independently develop similar traits in response to parallel challenges. Just as animals evolve similar features independently, our individual expressions often converge into shared identities shaped by digital and cultural environments.
This interplay of individuality and shared identity reflects a profound pattern—one we see as we merge physical and digital selves.
Prolific echoes: identity in the age of mass digital presence
Having a large audience or a long-lasting digital footprint creates hyper-conformity, often forcing alignment with popular trends. The impact of this is called prolificity. Hans-George Moeller and Paul D’Ambrosio critique this dynamic, “Under prolificity, the pursuit of truth has given way to the maintenance of identities, a recipe for a polarised society.”
Echoing this, filmmaker Adam Curtis in 2017 warned, "We may look back at self-expression as the terrible deadening conformity of our time." If you don’t know him already, Adam Curtis makes iconic films exploring superstructures of society.
This dynamic reveals how our digital evolution mirrors a pendulum swing between individuality and conformity—reshaping identities in response to social pressures.
Operating with your selves
Today, we inhabit fragmented digital personas, and in the future these avatars may become more integral to us. As we shape our digital avatars they will likely shape us in return. The Proteus effect is a psychological phenomenon that reveals how virtual avatars can influence real-life behaviour. If someone uses an avatar that is more attractive or confident, they may start to exhibit that confidence offline.
To manage our digital selves, we might need a more flexible approach than a “CEO of the mind.” Imagine a collaborative system where different aspects of ourselves lead at different times. Exploring this interplay of power and attention can help us adapt to future technologies, ensuring that our real-world identity remains integrated as we explore facets of ourselves online.
Embracing the dance of digital selfhood
Contemplating these dynamics, I think of the balance between playful experimentation and the need for genuine self-awareness. As technology continues to live and grow, we’ll likely navigate the tension between the freedom to shape our identities and the responsibility that comes with it.
Our digital lives are an ever-evolving canvas, inviting us to explore, adapt, and find authenticity amid the fluidity of online expression.
Thank you for reading!
Love,
Dayvan ღ꧁ღ╭⊱ꕥ
PS. Book an intro call or reach out to collaborate
Delicious tidbits:
“…a simultaneous exchange occurs between the two entities, our digital [profiles] and our in-real-life self. As we broadcast idealised portraits of our in-real-life self online, we then in turn adjust our in-real-life self so as to meet with popular approval when we are broadcast online again. At a certain point, our in-real-life self and digital [profiles] practically merge.” — Jeremy Weissman, The Crowdsourced Panopticon
“Like a spontaneous projector of different lifeforms and frequencies, [our sense of self] formidably constrains and construes the reflections of its own castings. It is an ever-present but invisible navigator or sculptor in a lifelong journey…” - Michael J. Mahoney, “Human Change Processes”
“As we speculate on who we will become as humanity shifts its focus towards the potential of the non-physical, it’s wise to review the original meaning of the word ‘avatar’ as defined in Sanskrit, the ancient mother tongue of Hinduism: it means ‘descent’, signifying the manifestation or incarnation of a deity released on Earth. Perhaps fittingly, it’s the word we now use to describe how we’ll self-create to become the gods and goddesses of our own imagination.” - The Fabricant
Resources:
Social Media: Why it Sickens the Self and Divides Society, by Academy of Ideas
Adam Curtis on the dangers of self-expression, by Adam Curtis
The Proteus Effect, Nick Yee and Jeremy Bailenson in 2007